I was digging around the Christianity Today website and found the article Ex-gay Sheds The Mocking Quote Marks which is an article featuring former Exodus President Bob Davies. Here are some excerpts (Published on 1/7/2002) :
… After 22 years, I’ve been aware for a while that I was ready for a change. I loved it, and this has been the most exciting, fulfilling time in my life.
But as I prayed about it, I got an impression or a message from the Lord, and it was a message of two words: “Finish well.” I thought, Okay, what does that mean? Am I going to be dying of cancer in the next couple of years? I hope not.
Over the years I have seen some people leave Exodus for bad reasons—because they’re struggling sexually, because they’ve fallen into immorality. I wanted to leave Exodus as a positive role model for other leaders.
Bob sure did leave as a positive role model. I have the utmost respect for him overall as a Christian leader and godly man. Not to mention his 30 year ex-gay, or Christian post-gay, journey.
The article goes on to talk about the creation of Exodus Youth and helping parents. Bob talks about the Spitzer study that proves that some people can and do actually change their sexual orientation.
He also goes on to say that the new generation of Exodus leadership, now in place for 8 years, has a different approach to the gay community:
Are you hopeful that Exodus will be taken more seriously by the gay-rights movement?
I’m very excited about the next generation of leaders in Exodus. They do things differently. The founding generation tended to be isolated. It was more the mindset that we came out of the gay community and now we’re going to stay away—if you interact with them, they may pull you back in. The young leaders in Exodus love dialogue, and they’re not afraid to go out for coffee with any gay activist who calls.
I think that’s a more biblical pattern. I think that’s the example that Jesus gave. He went out into society, and he was not afraid to go into what we would think of as unpleasant or uncomfortable situations and be himself and shed light in darkness.
I’m noticing now that the major gay media no longer waste even one sentence explaining what Exodus is. They assume that their millions of readers know exactly what Exodus is or what ex-gay is. We always used to have quote marks around ex-gay, and a lot of times now they don’t even bother with that. It’s common knowledge in the gay community that we exist. So we’ve had actually more interaction with the gay press. Some of my favorite interviews are with the gay media, because I love to blow their stereotypes of what ex-gay Christians are like. I think that they are shocked at how friendly I am. I treat them with respect, I give them abundant time.
I would say that is still true. Their will be a few gay activists/and bloggers who will be upset because we don’t grant them interviews but I have to agree with Bob, some of my best conversations and interviews have been with honest bloggers and legitimate gay media. They may not be on our side in the final piece but … the conversations are usually pretty good. I also love my gay friends. Very helpful and a blessing sometimes. I hope the blessing is mutual.
Here is the concluding section of the article:
Have evangelical churches grown in love for people who struggle with homosexuality?
They’re getting better. I received a call from the senior pastor of a fairly sizable church. He is ex-gay, but nobody knows except his wife. He’s been out of it for 20 years; he’s been married for 18 and has two teenage daughters. He had never heard of Exodus before, until he read about us in his local newspaper. There are all kinds of these people out there. They are not about to tell anybody what God has redeemed them from.
That’s a frustration to me, because they’re some of the most solid stories of transformation that I’ve ever heard. But there’s a perceived risk that if they are open about their Christian testimony—this is so ironic—they’re afraid that they’ll be out of a job, or they’ll be stigmatized, or they’ll lose important relationships in the church.
So I wish that all of those people would have the freedom to be open about their background. It would become such common knowledge in Christianity that people would take it for granted that people can get out of this. They would all know somebody, or two or three people. They would say, “Oh yeah, I used to be in that, but God took me out of that” and it would not be that big a deal. That’s the day I pray for.
Amen! I pray for that too. Even so, I think there has been significant progress toward the Church growing in there love for those who struggle with homosexuality. We launched the Exodus Church Association after Bob’s departure but I am sure he is very pleased with its development.
I miss Bob.
About Randy Thomas
I miss Bob too. I used to see him every year at a writer’s conference we both attended. Now he’s gone in another direction than writing and he no longer comes to the conference. He’s made an impact on many, many people. He was one of the first people I confided in about my own “exodus.”
Hi Nathan. Thank you for your comment.
I miss Bob too. I used to see him every year at a writer’s conference we both attended. Now he’s gone in another direction than writing and he no longer comes to the conference. He’s made an impact on many, many people. He was one of the first people I confided in about my own “exodus.”
Hi Nathan. Thank you for your comment.
This reminds me of a famous speech by Harvey Milk. When a bill was being brought to a vote which barred homosexuals from teaching in the public schools, Milk gave a rousing speech encouraging men and women to come out of the closet. He argued that as long as they stayed as a silent people, they would be stepped on. He argued that everyone should come out, so that when laws like those would come about, people would vote against those laws because “gee, my uncle is gay and he’s an alright fella!”
In the same manner, I think more people should be open about their testimonies like Bob said. I tremble and sweat when I have to get up and share my story. Many times I get a raised eye brow, crossed arms or a gaping mouth… and all this from the church! little do they know that there are other people at my church with stories just like mine!
Milk’s dream has been acheived to a large extent. You’d be hard pressed to find anyone in most of America that doesn’t know a homosexually identified person. But still… the ex-gay is seen as a phenomenon. Growing up, I struggled because I knew I didn’t want to be gay yet in the public square all I saw were straight people, closeted people and proudly gay people. I figured theorhetically someone could leave homosexuality… but much like the blind man who was given sight by God… I never actually met one.
I too dream of the day when saying “I came out of homosexuality” is no big deal because “oh yea… my uncle left homosexuality too!”
perhaps one day…
Very true. I think that day is coming. I don’t say that flippantly.
This reminds me of a famous speech by Harvey Milk. When a bill was being brought to a vote which barred homosexuals from teaching in the public schools, Milk gave a rousing speech encouraging men and women to come out of the closet. He argued that as long as they stayed as a silent people, they would be stepped on. He argued that everyone should come out, so that when laws like those would come about, people would vote against those laws because “gee, my uncle is gay and he’s an alright fella!”
In the same manner, I think more people should be open about their testimonies like Bob said. I tremble and sweat when I have to get up and share my story. Many times I get a raised eye brow, crossed arms or a gaping mouth… and all this from the church! little do they know that there are other people at my church with stories just like mine!
Milk’s dream has been acheived to a large extent. You’d be hard pressed to find anyone in most of America that doesn’t know a homosexually identified person. But still… the ex-gay is seen as a phenomenon. Growing up, I struggled because I knew I didn’t want to be gay yet in the public square all I saw were straight people, closeted people and proudly gay people. I figured theorhetically someone could leave homosexuality… but much like the blind man who was given sight by God… I never actually met one.
I too dream of the day when saying “I came out of homosexuality” is no big deal because “oh yea… my uncle left homosexuality too!”
perhaps one day…
Very true. I think that day is coming. I don’t say that flippantly.
Very true. I think that day is coming. I don’t say that flippantly.
Very true. I think that day is coming. I don’t say that flippantly.