Homophobic Stigmatization vs True Homophobia

pointing

The previous post clearly involved a true case of homophobia and a general response on how to overcome it. In response on our Facebook page, Melissa said: Most who call homosexuality a sin or stand up against the gay agenda are called homophobic! There are many complex agendas and some powerful ones coalesce into pro-gay cultural momentum across the board in all sectors of society.  When people minimize the complexity of that reality (minimizing it to simply, "The Gay Agenda"), we set ourselves up to be easily stigmatized with false labels.  Maybe if we put down our pointing fingers/verbal … [Read more...]

Overcoming Homophobia

confession

B writes: I have a severe case of homophobia to the point of my body physically reacting to it.  I shake, I get angry and my heart beats very quickly even at the mention of it.  I know the issue isn't the sin itself it's repentance and those whom identify with homosexuality are no different from me. I know all the textbook answers but I'm struggling to fix myself and I can't seem to find any help or advice that doesn't involve the social annoyance with Christians. Hi B, thank you for sending in your message. With regards to the inordinate and even bodily reaction to the anger you feel, … [Read more...]

Telling Your Story: Sharing Your Struggle With Family at the Holidays

family

The holidays can be intense time.  Food, family, fun - and often friction.  It’s also a time when those of us who are struggling to overcome same-sex attraction may choose to “come out” to our families. I came out to my dad as gay-identified at around 15 or 16, then a post/ex-gay at 25, and then as an Exodus ministry leader probably around 29 or 30.  He raised me as a single dad from when I was an early teen, and my mom was in and out of the picture.  At one point, a family member out’ed me to my mom, but she & I never talked about it since our relationship has always been … [Read more...]

Does Being Older Make it More Difficult to Overcome Homosexuality? – Real Answers by Randy Thomas

QA

This article appears in both our offline and online newsletters.  To receive articles like this along with the full newsletter online via email or offline through the postal service please sign up here. — The following question was recently submitted at our Rockford IL Love Won Out conference. Real Answers by Randy Thomas I have lived a gay life for over 30 years. Is this going to be more difficult to overcome than someone who is much younger? That is a very good question and the short answer in many cases would be yes.  There are 30 years worth of memories and relational … [Read more...]

What’s in a Name? The Story of Brenna Kate Simonds – Part 2

My Wedding Day

Yesterday, I shared the first half of my story.  This is the second half. I had just become a Christian.  In one sense, I felt hope, but at the same time, the labels were still haunting me.  Even though at the time I could not voice what was going on, I continued to spiral out of control with my eating and relationships. I was so desperate for love that I entered into a relationship with an 18 year old woman with a drug problem (I was 24 at the time). After 3 months, this woman (having been raised in a Christian home) said to me, “Listen – the Bible says you must either be hot or … [Read more...]

What’s in a Name? The Story of Brenna Kate Simonds – Part 1

Brenna with a mohawk from having her head shaved

A Christian speaker recently reminded me that words are a container for power. The book of Proverbs says “reckless words pierce like a sword”, “the words of the wicked lie in wait for blood”, and “when words are many, sin is not absent”.  In the Bible, words & names are very important. Throughout my life, I allowed people and circumstances to label me, name me, and define who I am. I was born prematurely in May of 1975. I was given a 50% chance of survival and rode in an ambulance to a hospital 50 miles away since the hospital where I was born did not have premie … [Read more...]

Let’s Talk About Those Gay Rats

rat

John Cloud writes in Why You're Gay: A New Study Shows Why Boy Rats Like Other Boy Rats: Despite what the Bible says, lust is inborn: our species couldn't survive if we didn't yearn to have sex with one another. But exactly how sexual desire develops is, even at this late date, poorly understood. We know more about the musculature of the left femur than we do about how our brains acquire and process the desire to engage sexually. That's why I was intrigued by a new study in the journal Psychological Science. Typically I don't care about studies of rat behavior because, after all, the … [Read more...]

What’s Healthy vs. Unhealthy Same-Sex Relationships? – Real Answers Article for October 2010

QA

This article appears in both our offline and online newsletters.  To receive articles like this along with the full newsletter online via email or offline through the postal service please sign up here. --- How can I discern the difference between healthy and unhealthy same-sex relationships?  by Kristin Tremba When I was struggling with same-sex attraction, I found myself attracted to women who offered to meet all my emotional needs. These relationships were intense, secretive, and all-consuming. Instead of admiring a fellow female as a friend, I worshiped her as an idol. Why did … [Read more...]

Why Does The Gay Community Refuse to Acknowledge Our Testimony?

Q&A

This question was left on my formspring service after I wrote this post on my personal blog.  I will answer it by parsing out the different points.  First ... How can people in the gay community make that claim dismissing a person once being gay? I think some (not all) make that claim just like Conservatives and/or Christians who used to claim (some still do) that there are no truly gay people.  What I have discovered is that people on both sides, actually people in general, are not usually happy with others whose identity and/or moral systems are based in direct opposite views to their … [Read more...]

Love Won Out Rockford Illinois this Weekend

Click to Visit Love Won Out Website

Love Won Out is this weekend! <-- The exclamation point denotes genuine excitement.  I have been to many of LWO's and am blessed at every one.  Here are a couple of examples of why: One parent, who recently attended a Love Won Out event, said, “God spoke to me about my need to show more love and acceptance towards our son who is gay and to trust Him to use this in my own life to grow me to be all He wants me to be.” After attending the event, one man wrote, “I came to the conference ready to give up, walk out of my marriage and pursue a gay lifestyle. The conference gave me hope … [Read more...]